If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch,
"Who’s on First?" might have turned out something like this:

 

 

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store….How may I help you?

COSTELLO: Hello, I’m setting up an office in my den and I’m thinking about
buying a computer.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: No, the name’s Lou.

ABBOTT: No, I’m talking about your computer.

COSTELLO: I don’t have a computer. I want to buy one.

ABBOTT: Mac?

COSTELLO: I told you, my name’s Lou.

ABBOTT: Never mind that.  What about Windows?

 

 

COSTELLO:  I already have windows, I just need a computer. 

ABBOTT:  You probably want to get Windows for your new computer, too.

 


COSTELLO:  I have windows on my wall, why would I need them for the computer?

 

 

ABBOTT:  So you can see something when you turn on your computer.

 


COSTELLO: Really?  What is it you see when you turn on the computer?

ABBOTT: Wallpaper.

COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.

ABBOTT: Software for Windows?

COSTELLO: No. The computer! I need something I can use to write
proposals, track expenses and run my business.  What do you suggest I use in my office?

ABBOTT: Office.


COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?

ABBOTT: I just did.

 


COSTELLO: You just did what?

ABBOTT: Recommend something.


COSTELLO:  I can’t recommend something, I want YOU to recommend something.

 

 

ABBOTT:  I just did.

 

 

COSTELLO:  You just did what?

 

 

ABBOTT:  I recommended something.

 


COSTELLO: You recommended something?

ABBOTT: Yes.

COSTELLO: For my office?

ABBOTT: Yes.


COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?

ABBOTT: Office.

COSTELLO: Yes, for my office!


ABBOTT: Office with Windows.

COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let’s just say I’m
sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. what do I need?

ABBOTT: Word.

COSTELLO: What word?

ABBOTT: Word in Office.

COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.

 


ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.

COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows?

ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue "W".

COSTELLO: I’m going to click your blue "w" if you don’t start with some
straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can
track my money with?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: That’s right. What do you have?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?

ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.

COSTELLO: What’s bundled with my computer?

ABBOTT: Money.

COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?

ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.

COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?

ABBOTT: One copy.

COSTELLO: Isn’t it illegal to copy money?

ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.

COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?

ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT!

A few days later.

ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?

COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?

ABBOTT: Click on "START

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